Catharsis

(Published 12.7.2009)

http://www.dailynationalcourier.com/national_courier/jul2009_daily/12-07-09/artical/artical1.htm

Just how far our elected representatives are ready to go to defend their right to extract tax, not matter how unjust it may be, is obvious from the latest fiasco surrounding prices of petroleum, diesel and kerosene oil prices. The prices of these essential items without which life could be brought to a standstill were upped through a presidential order issued around midnight snatching away the relief given to the people through a stay order issued by a three-member of the Supreme Court headed by Chief Justice Iftikhar Muhammad Chaudhary, whom an overwhelming majority of 170 million Pakistanis see as its only "Savior"; and Judiciary, its only hope.
It may appear strange to the civilized world that an elected government could go to such length to deprive the people of a just relief, long overdue as it is, in a bid to avoid implementing order issued by the top court. The move, however, doesn't surprise the people despite the shock because they know that all excesses against them are perpetrated in their name and for "their own good" by their globe-trotting leaders who live in luxury that could shame leaders of the richest and the most developed nations. Shocked as they are the unfortunate people of this country understand that they've been taken for a ride despite the emergence of democracy that has given today's elected representatives the right, and the might, to impose taxes to maintain their luxurious lifestyles.
The presidential order has been challenged at the Supreme Court and may come up for hearing any day next week. Meanwhile it has become necessary for the over-taxed underpaid; financially, economically and politically abused; hungry; tattered; roofless; exploited and powerless masses of this country to find ways to vent out their anger and feeling of helplessness. That explains the reason for jokes; adapted to suit "˜Pakistani' taste, you will read in the following paragraphs. You are free to smile or laugh at these jokes that aim to serve as a vehicle for catharsis that all of us subjects need so badly.
A Dutch visiting the US was chatting with an American friend jokingly explaining his Red, White and Blue of Netherlands' Flag said, "You see, our flag symbolizes our taxes. We get red when we talk about them, white when we get our tax bill, and blue after we pay them." "Hey, That's exactly the case with us except we also see the stars", replied his American friend.
A Japanese tourist visiting this land of pure hires a taxi at the airport to go to his hotel. On the ways he sees a Toyota overtaking the taxi and shouts "Toyota, made in Japan. Very fast, very fast". Then he sees a Honda and leaning out of the window shouts loudly, "Honda, made in Japan. Very fast, ha ha". Needless to say his antics annoy the Pakistani cab driver who after reaching hotel demands five hundred dollars as fare. The Japanese tourist, shocked as he is, says that the fare is too much on which the driver puts his hand on the meter and says "Made in Pakistan, very fast"¦ very fast !!!" I do not take any responsibility if this joke reminds you about electricity meters that we all dread profusely.
A female patient tells her Pakistani doctor that every single part of her body hurts. The doctor asks, "Show me where." The woman touches her arm and screams, "Ouch!" She then touches her head, nose, ear and leg; screams, "Ouch!" every time, looks at the doctor and says, "See? It hurts everywhere!" The Pakistani doctor just laughs and say, "Don't worry; it's not serious. You've just got a broken index finger. Just pay Rs 5,000 to the cashier for the teatement."
A Pakistani taxman walks into the Executive Dining Lounge of an industrial complex housing number of units. He sits down, drinks an ice-cold soft drink, and then left, only to find that his car along with the tax collected in cash was stolen. He walks back into the lounge, takes out a pistol and shouts,
"Which one of you stole the money". When no one talks he yells, "The car and money be better returned before I finish drinking my next soda or I'll have to do what I did in Faisalabad, and I didn't like doing what I did". After he finishes his drink he finds his car parked outside the lounge with money in full. As he heads towards his car the lounge manager comes out running and asks "Just what did you do in Faisalabad, mister?" and the taxman replies, "I had to walk all the way to my regional office ".
World famous super detective Sherlock Holmes and his as famous sidekick Dr. Watson went on a camping trip. After a long day of hiking they stopped, set up camp, had dinner, read a little and went to sleep. Around one o'clock in the night Holmes got awoke and saw Watson was also awake. Holmes asked, "Watson-look up into the sky and tell me what you see". Watson responded "Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Theologically, it tells me God is great and that we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, it tells me that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What does it tell you?' Holmes listened his long harangue and politely said, "Actually somebody has stolen our tent, Watson."
Someone has stolen tents of tens of millions of poverty-ridden people in our part of the world.