Examples of being disobedient to your parents & Etiquette of dealing with parents
æ ÞÖì ÑÈß ÃáÇ ÊÚÈÏæÇ ÅáÇ ÅíÇå æ ÈÇáæÇáÏíä ÅÍÓÇäÇ ÅãÇ íÈáÛä ÚäÏß ÇáßÈÑ ÃÍÏåãÇ Ãæ ßáÇåãÇ ÝáÇ ÊÞá áåãÇ ÃÝ æ áÇ ÊäåÑåãÇ æ Þá áåãÇ ÞæáÇ ßÑíãÇ Thy Lord hath decreed that ye worship none but Him, and that ye be kind to parents. Whether one or both of them attain old stage in thy life , say no word to them in contempt , nor repel them but address them in terms of honor. And, out of kindness, bower to them the wing of humility, and say: “ My Lord! Bestow upon them thy mercy even as they cherished me childhood”. 17:23-24
ãä ÕæÑ ÇáÚÞæÞ
Examples of being disobedient to your parents
1- ÅÈßÇÁ ÇáæÇáÏíä æÊÍÒíäåãÇ ÈÇáÞæá Ãæ ÇáÝÚá
Make one or both parents sad/or making them cry.
2- äåÑåãÇ æÒÌÑåãÇ ¡ æÑÝÚ ÇáÕæÊ ÚáíåãÇ
Yelling, shouting at the parents and or/ raising the voice. .
3- ÇáÊÃÝÝ ãä ÃæÇãÑåãÇ
Annoyed with the parents orders or requests.
.4- ÇáÚÈæÓ æÊÞØíÈ ÇáÌÈíä ÃãÇãåãÇ ¡ æÇáäÙÑ ÅáíåãÇ ÔÒÑÇð
Giving mean glances or directing harsh facial expressions towards the parents.
.5- ÇáÃãÑ ÚáíåãÇ
Bossing the parents around, or trying to have authority over them.
.6- ÇäÊÞÇÏ ÇáØÚÇã ÇáÐí ÊÚÏå ÇáæÇáÏÉ
Critcize the food that the mom prepares.
.7- ÊÑß ÇáÅÕÛÇÁ áÍÏíËåãÇ
Ignoring the parents while they are still talking to you
.8- Ðã ÇáæÇáÏíä ÃãÇã ÇáäÇÓ
Criticizing the parents in front of people.
.9- ÔÊãåãÇ
Cursing the parents /insulting them.
.10- ÅËÇÑÉ ÇáãÔßáÇÊ ÃãÇãåãÇ ÅãÇ ãÚ ÇáÃÎæÉ ¡ Ãæ ãÚ ÇáÒæÌÉ
Making trouble with family members in front of the parents.
.11- ÊÔæíå ÓãÚÊåãÇ
Distorting the parents image and portraying an awful picture of them.
.12- ÅÏÎÇá ÇáãäßÑÇÊ ááãäÒá ¡ Ãæ ãÒÇæáÉ ÇáãäßÑÇÊ ÃãÇãåãÇ
Doing haram deeds in front of the parents/or bring it to their house.
.13- ÇáãßæË ØæíáÇð ÎÇÑÌ ÇáãäÒá ¡ ãÚ ÍÇÌÉ ÇáæÇáÏíä æÚÏã ÅÐäåãÇ ááæáÏ Ýí ÇáÎÑæÌ
Being outside of the house for long hours,knowing that they are being needed by the parents
and not being given permission to go out.
.14- ÊÞÏíã ØÇÚÉ ÇáÒæÌÉ/ÇáÒæÌ Ãæ ÇáÕÏíÞ ÚáíåãÇ
Favoring the wife/husband and friends over the parents.
.15- ÇáÊÚÏí ÚáíåãÇ ÈÇáÖÑÈ
Abusing the parents physically.
16- ÅíÏÇÚåã ÏæÑ ÇáÚÌÒÉ Placing the parents in a senior house.
.17- Êãäí ÒæÇáåãÇ
Wishing if the parents are dead.
.18- ÞÊáåãÇ ÚíÇÐÇð ÈÇááå
Killing the parents(wal-ayathu-billah).
.19- ÇáÈÎá ÚáíåãÇ æÇáãäÉ ¡ æÊÚÏÇÏ ÇáÃíÇÏí
Being cheap and greedy towards the parents
and remind them of the favours that you have done for them.
.20- ßËÑÉ ÇáÔßæì æÇáÃäíä ÃãÇã ÇáæÇáÏíä . Complaining in front of them.
ÇáÂÏÇÈ ÇáÊí íäÈÛí ãÑÇÚÇÊåÇ ãÚ ÇáæÇáÏíä
Etiquette of dealing with parents
1- ØÇÚÊåãÇ ÈÇáãÚÑæÝ ¡æÇáÅÍÓÇä ÅáíåãÇ ¡ æÎÝÖ ÇáÌäÇÍ áåãÇ
Obey them in goodness and be kind and humble with them. .
2- ÇáÝÑÍ ÈÃæÇãÑåãÇ æãÞÇÈáÊåãÇ ÈÇáÈÔÑ æÇáÊÑÍÇÈ
Be glad when they ask you to do something for them,
smile to them.
.3- ãÈÇÏÃÊåãÇ ÈÇáÓáÇã æÊÞÈíá ÃíÏíåãÇ æÑÄÓåãÇ
Say the salam to them before they do,and kiss their hands and forehed.
.4- ÇáÊæÓÚÉ áåãÇ Ýí ÇáãÌáÓ æÇáÌáæÓ ¡ ÃãÇãåãÇ ÈÃÏÈ æÇÍÊÑÇã ¡ æÐáß ÈÊÚÏíá ÇáÌáÓÉ¡ æÇáÈÚÏ Úä ÇáÞåÞåÉ ÃãÇãåãÇ ¡ æÇáÊÚÑí ¡ Ãæ ÇáÇÖØÌÇÚ ¡ Ãæ ãÏ ÇáÑÌá ¡ Ãæ ãÒÇæáÉ ÇáãäßÑÇÊ ÃãÇãåãÇ ¡ Åáì ÛíÑ Ðáß ããÇ íäÇÝí ßãÇá ÇáÃÏÈ ãÚåãÇ
Make space for them to sit
Sit with respect in front of them
Don't cross your leg in front of them
.5- ãÓÇÚÏÊåãÇ Ýí ÇáÃÚãÇá
Help them in their errands.
.6- ÊáÈíÉ äÏÇÆåãÇ ÈÓÑÚÉ
When they call your name,respond immediately.
.7- ÇáÈÚÏ Úä ÅÒÚÇÌåãÇ ¡ æÊÌäÈ ÇáÔÌÇÑ æÅËÇÑÉ ÇáÌÏá ÈÍÖÑÊåãÇ
Stay away from annoying them
Causing troubles or arguing in front of them.
.8- Çä íãÔí ÃãÇãåÇ ÈÇááíá æÎáÝåãÇ ÈÇáäåÇÑ
In the night time,walk in front of them
In the daylight, walk behind them.
.9- ÃáÇ íãÏóø íÏóå ááØÚÇã ÞÈáåãÇ
Don't reach for food before them.
.10- ÅÕáÇÍ ÐÇÊ ÇáÈíä ÅÐÇ ÝÓÏÊ Èíä ÇáæÇáÏíä
If they have problems with each other, try to work things out between them.
.11- ÇáÇÓÊÆÐÇä ÚáíåãÇ ÍÇá ÇáÏÎæá ÚáíåãÇ ¡ Ãæ ÍÇá ÇáÎÑæÌ ãä ÇáãäÒá
Ask for permission to enter their room.
.12- ÊÐßíÑåãÇ ÈÇááå ¡ æÊÚáíãåãÇ ãÇ íÌåáÇäå ¡ æÃãÑåãÇ ÈÇáãÚÑæÝ ¡ æäåíåãÇ Úä ÇáãäßÑ ãÚ ãÑÇÚÇÉ ÇááØÝ æÇáÅÔÝÇÞ æÇáÕÈÑ
Remind them of Allah and teach them what they don't know from their religion
Enjoin the good and forbid the evil.
.13- ÇáãÍÇÝÙÉ Úáì ÓãÚÊåãÇ æÐáß ÈÍÓ ÇáÓíÑÉ ¡ æÇáÇÓÊÞÇãÉ ¡ æÇáÈÚÏ Úä ãæÇØä ÇáÑíÈ æÕÍÈÉ ÇáÓæÁ
Honor them by behaving in a good way and stay away from doubts and bad company.
.14- ÊÌäÈ áæãåãÇ æÊÞÑíÚåãÇ æÇáÊÚäíÝ ÚáíåãÇ
Do not blame them or be harsh with them.
.15- ÇáÚãá Úáì ãÇ íÓÑåãÇ æÅä áã íÃãÑÇ Èå
Do whatever makes them happy even if they didn't request from you.
.16- Ýåã ØÈíÚÉ ÇáæÇáÏíä ¡ æãÚÇãáÊåãÇ ÈÐáß ÇáãÞÊÖì
Understand the parents personalities and deal with them accordingly.
.17- ßËÑÉ ÇáÏÚÇÁ æÇáÇÓÊÛÝÇÑ áåãÇ Ýí ÇáÍíÇÉ æÈÚÏ ÇáããÇÊ
Ask Allah to forgive them and make duaá for them at all times
in their lives and after their death.
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